Posted by: chris   in Fish Talk

I guess there are two ways to look at life, in one version we are born and journey to a destination in a body the needs food and shelter which horbours needs and desires that it drives us relentlessly to fill.

Then there are the “late at night” demons that haunt our endless drive for success and happiness. The questions asked by inner ghosts that won’t be stilled regardless of apparent outward conquests.

From early days we are thought and formed for a world that asks us to be what we are not designed to be, hence the negative positive laurel “well adjusted” which we hang on the shoulders of those who do as society deems fit for a creature of their status.

I if I might be so bold, casting all humility to the sidelines, tell you that I am a confidante of demons. I have lain awake on more nights than I care to remember taking their council, debating, whining and resenting their thick skinned inability to stay when they where clearly an unwanted and uninvited guest.

The Reality of life in a body is that anyone can make or lose a dollar, euro or pound. Few, so few, so precious few ever come to terms with the notion that when death is the only option nothing really matters.

The Buddha’s most famous quote is “Life is Pain” and as I join the 5am commute from Boston’s South Shore to mundanity I am stunned by the joylessness of my fellow commuters, their faces bear an expression that would serve a graveside well. The reality for most people is that they hate their lives while pretending to the world that all is well.

Integrity is possibly the greatest gift that you can give to another human being. But, and let me pause while I try to decide should I underline this but or highlight it to infer importance on it.

OK! But integrity is by far the greatest gift you can give to yourself.

Oh! to be honest and admit I hate my job and I hate my friends and to be honest the only reason I do most if not all the things I do is because I am scared and don’t know a better way.

I have bills and I have responsibilities and I am lost in this life that I thought I created but to tell the truth really just crept up on me.

I have found that there is no pain in any condition that is fully accepted.

So I need money for food and rent or mortgage, so I do work that does not please me, so what.

If I need to socialize then I socialize, this is about me releasing not about the company, their motives are their prerogative.

A very wise demon told me once that if one, just one tiny detail within the realm of the entire universe is accepted as right, this inadvertently dictates that everything else in the totality of the universe must be wrong.

The actual process of thought pertaining to universal right/wrong/truth is that just as  nothing is ever right, nothing is ever wrong.

Not right, not wrong, just being! And seeing as we are human beings it would naturally follow that nothing we do is ever right or wrong, it is just us being what we are.

Society which is run by people with money for people with money however needs to create wrongs to enable preferences to be made that were not included in the original universal constitution as written by creator.

So we have this broken system superimposed on perfection.

Imagine within the eyes of creation you are perfection personified while in the eyes of society you are WRONG, maladjusted and/or inferior.

So the next time you lie awake consorting with your demons ask them to explain just why something you where created to do makes you feel wrong!

In the end you will find that all that really matters from the perspective of truth is that you be true to yourself.

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This entry was posted on Sunday, January 23rd, 2011 at 4:13 pm and is filed under Fish Talk. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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